20 February 2015

Reasons For Silence

source: tumblr

I barely have time to breathe in, breathe out, and already it is the 20th of February. Life passing like a stream, around rocks, down falls, steaming and foaming, calm like a lake, fast as a gallop. Projects and ideas buzzing like bees into my head, as my energy runs dry under work obligations and February illnesses. But I am not forgetting la Nife, and here are some of the bees, some of the planned posts, hoping to make you think and wait...

It seems the journey of simplicity creates some sort of loop of life questioning. As if waking up made it impossible to shut this one down. I've met a sci fi writer called Alain Damasio and I've been thinking about my writings. Or lack thereof. I re-coded websites, dreamed some ideas, didn't write a line.


I've started editing my wardrobe in preparation for spring (maybe because February makes me long for spring?) I've also come to the conclusion that wardrobe is a loop, too. When I wake up at 6 and hurry to work meetings, I grab the same uniform I wore on my first day of junior school, the same I took refuge in after my first editing in 2011. Simple black denim, leather flats, a simple yet elegant loose tee, a cardigan, a leather jacket. And natural stone jewelry.


I've been thinking on minimalism, too. What does it really mean? Is this to material consumption what anorexia is to food? A visceral reaction of our rich society to an overload of everything? Can we talk about minimalism in moderation? Can we talk about minimalism while setting aside the material aspect of it?


I've been thinking about the cost of minimalism, or rather, of ethical choices. The reaction I get the most when I explain I no longer buy from high street stores is; "but many people can't afford to buy anything else". Can't they? I've never been rich, yet never been poor either. Can I be a judge of anything? Is it a privilege to refuse to support poor working and environmental conditions with my wallet? Is buying less the ultimate solution? Second hand? Small creators? Is it indecent to spend 100€ on an organic, ethically produced knit when a family of Romanians beg for money every night in front of my local supermarket? But what else can I do?


Also, I've been revising my idea of "adequacy" when considering my whole collection of objects. Because M. le fiancĂ© finally found a job in Paris. Humans and possessions will be reunited, in a soon to be found maxi-palace in Paris. At least 40m². We dream big in Paris. But moving creates some early spring cleaning urges. Do I really need all these books? What about last generation games? Where will I display my minerals? Also, anticipated fights about the colour of the curtains. But that's the flow of life.


When all of this collides in my head, usually somewhere around 2AM, when I walk sleepily to the kitchen to fill the bottle of water, I keep myself grounded with the small, ordinary joys of daily life. A new bunch of flowers every week on my mini coffee table - which is really a stool but hush, don't tell my guests. The first sip of coffee in this hand-made cup I found last month in Alsace, running hot down my throat, waking every cell in my body. The sensation of a book first opened, the smell of the pages, tasting the first few words like a fine bottle of Champagne. Taking in a piece of violin music, eyes closed, letting the tune speak to my soul. The beauty of rain falling on the asphalte. The unique taste of the cheese mother brought from Auvergne. Connecting with new friends, old colleagues, discovering new artists, letting life flow. This sensation that I am exactly where I am meant to be. Have you ever trusted life that way? Maybe that's what faith is really about.


See what I meant with all these bees in my head? Hopefully, my energy will pulse back in the coming weeks, to make ideas more concrete. I hope I haven't lost you with that somewhat scattered post. See you around!

21 comments:

  1. Kali,
    I would love to read more on your thoughts on the anorexia analogy. I find myself contemplating the dark sides of minimalism - feelings of superiority over others (this also relates to the ethical aspects) and one's own desires and forms of self-deprivation at the same time.
    Also, you talked about a beauty product edit a while ago, it'd be interesting to see where you got with that.
    Thank you for ever thought provoking posts.
    D

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    1. Thanks for your note! Indeed I am also questioning some of the darker sides of minimalism these days, as the movement becomes more trendy and tends to become an instrument of sorts for many brands or persons. Also as it may be misunderstood, but isn't it the case of anything that gains popularity? I found the anaolgy with anorexia interesting to explore, but as I've never lived anorexia myself, it might be hard to go in depth into this subject.
      On the beauty products front, I have a stable routine now after months of finishing products and editing habits one by one, I'll definitely have something to share on this shortly!

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  2. I'm really looking forward to these posts, especially the February one and the home tour!

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    1. Thanks! I've started to take pictures so this will happen shortly (hopefully!)

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  3. I also think a lot about the costs of ethical choices, but don't have any good answers on any of those questions. Speaking as someone who will be making a good salary (even for NYC/Manhattan) but who is also encumbered by significant student loans, I can spend more to make certain ethical purchasing decisions, but that limits my ability to do the same in other areas. Sometimes, when it comes to clothes and fashion, it can be a challenge to figure out what is or isn't a better or more ethical choice. (I could, of course, take the time to research, but time will be in short supply when I graduate). I wonder if many of the challenges in the US are unique to the social context here, however.

    I look forward to the future posts that you listed! I always enjoy beauty routine posts.

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    1. The ethical question is definitely a difficult one, and there is probably not one answer to fit all. I sometimes wonder if I am too naive when I purchase rather expensive items from brands that claim to be ethical - I know from working in marketing that it is easier to create a positive image that answers to a target consumer's questionings, than it is to actually live up to these promises. Then there is the justification aspect: is it really an ethical investment, or an excuse to purchase a more luxurious garment made of a comfortable fabric while appeasing my consumer conscience? On the other hand, is it a bad thing to want to treat ourselves with a nice item, especially when it is (or claims to be) from ethical origin? A lot of questions which don't really have an answer, or, which have several different answers based on our core values, lifestyle, and, as you say, context. I tend to think it is already a good thing to engage in this questioning process in the first place though :)

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  4. Congratulations to le fiance on the job! Is Mlle. le chat ready for a new roommate?

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    1. Thanks! We're very happy even though moving itself is a troublesome affair. Mlle le Chat is more than ready to welcome a new human to ask food to :)

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  5. Such a beautifully written post!

    As for the 100e organic knit and the begging family... they are tough questions. But certainly if you are going to spend 100e on clothes, it makes more sense to buy one good than 5 mediocre pieces. It does not help the poor family at all if one spends the 100 euros on 5 pieces of cheap clothing instead of 1 piece of expensive clothing. It drives me nuts when people bring up the "but people just can't afford anything else but the cheapest chain stores!!!", because if people shopped there only because they absolutely can't afford to shop anywhere else how on Earth would fast fashion make so much money... besides at least here in Finland truly poor people buy their clothes at flea markets and recycling centers, not at trendy fast fashion shops. You can get clothes for less than 1 euro from recycling centers, which is a price even the cheapest chain stores can't beat.

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    1. Thanks! I agree that the "I can't afford anything else than high street stores" sometimes sounds like an excuse, coming from some people. Especially when said purchase comes as an addition to a jam packed closet. However, I also feel like my minimalist mindset sometimes leads me to be too judgemental about other people's choices and justifications, which is not really my place to criticize. What I would like to be able to do is offer ethical options which are not that expensive, like small, unknown creators who practice decent prices, second hand options etc. However such research requires time and effort, and "I don't want to spend time on my closet" is a justification I can understand, as I feel the same way...

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    2. Funnily enough, anyone I know who's actually poor (I mean: has less money than me) and would be quite justified in using the reason "but I just can't afford to shop anywhere else" has not in fact ever used this reasoning, but I've heard it from people who are much better off financially than me (which is not that difficult...). What I translate it to mean is "I can not afford to reserve more money for clothes shopping casually & without planning, for buying pleasure rather than actual clothing need, than the fast fashion chains' price point is" - which is exactly where they set their price point, to tempt people who have 15e-50e of leeway in their purse every now and then. For most people, at least those with any sort of income, it is a choice and not a necessity. Now I realise I sound terribly judgemental, which I admittedly am, but not at people's faces :D
      I'm also quite judgemental of the people who throw their mixed waste in the bio waste bin, although no doubt they have some particular excuse too.

      But for the reason of not having time to spend on researching for the perfect ecological-ethical-aesthetic clothing, it is much more sound, and I get that justification same as you. There's so much greenwashing and "fairwashing" going on, that one really needs to set time aside to find out which brands are for real and which are just talking, and I totally understand not everyone has the time, energy or motivation for that. It should anyway not be the responsibility of the consumer to act as a private detective, it would be better if the brands were more open or if there was some kind of easy-to-understand info available to base informed decisions. But again, if I hear this justification from people who spend a lot of time on shopping, talking about shopping and daydreaming about shopping...

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    3. Ah it's true that I often hear this excuse from people who are not that bad off financially. People I know who can't afford expensive clothes usually turn to second hand, sewing and restoring, that kind of stuff. Again, this might be judgmental but I kind of prefer people who admit their choices "I like to change every season and can't afford to redo all my closet in expensive ethical items" - I can disagree with that but at least they are honest. Another problem in my opinion is that we are used to high street prices and a hand-made item seems overpriced now, whereas you are really fairly paying the worker's work. It's difficult to change people's mindset about what a normal price point is for an object, and having expensive brand inflating prices of items still made in poor conditions doesn't help setting a right price mindset in consumer's heads (because an overpriced brand just sounds like consumer rip off, which it is. But then small creators who practice the same price are put in the same basket as these brands, if it makes any sense).

      Finally, on the transparency/research part, maybe it's the PR professional speaking here, but I think this investigative research should fall on teh hands of press. That brands put the best light on their business and product is normal, they are fighting for their own money and for their own business to thrive. I don't morally agree with brands who hide poor conditions from customers, but it's logical that they do. However, investigating, going beyond the PR talk and uncovering the reality of things should be the job of press, they are the counter-power of corporations. Thankfully, some do - in France we have magazines like 60 millions de consommateurs who investigate products, brands etc., help consumers with law suits and all. But for the specific domain of fashion, press is a joke. I think it' linked to the business model of these magazines, of which revenue is linked to advertisment, so you can hardly investigate and uncover uncomfortable truths about a brand that pays for ad space in your magazine. Conflit of interest, really, but that's a shame, it means there is no real counter-power to corporations in the fashion/beauty industry. Sorry I got carried away by my field of expertise :)

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  6. I read this title during a period of unbearable discomfort with noises in the city I live in. I thought once again we were going through similar thoughts. not a problem, though. just sharing.
    ok, just wanted to manifest I think it is a lovely idea to share your beauty routine.
    Actually everything you said resonates with me, but I am especially considering these questions, making my own beauty products, natural stuff, etc.

    hope to read you soon, whatever comes out ;)

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    1. Thanks! Sometimes it feels necessary to recede into some form of silence, too. I feel like I need a short "hibernation" period to restore my energy before the arrival of spring :)
      I don't know if my beauty routine post will be exciting, it is very simple, and inspired from advice I've read here and there so nothing new either. I still hope it can be useful though.

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  7. I'd love to hear more critical thoughts on minimalism and ethical choices. I too struggle with feelings of superiority and then white privilege (related to the trendiness of minimalism for sure). One remark though: I love talking with my brother about buying more ethically, because he's concerned about the same topics as I am but is a 'poor' student. He now buys most of his clothes second-hand, which is ultra cheap and in line with his ethics. He's also understanding and supportive of my reluctance towards second-hand clothes (difficult to find certain styles and sizes, time-consuming) and my efforts to buy fair and eco, even though he wouldn't spend the money for those brands.
    Another topic I've been concerned about is whether the minimalist approach is too much about personal responsibility. If you're in it for the social, ecological and thus ethical side, it serms rather easy to leave everything to the individual and their journey and their preferences and what constitutes minimalism for them. But I haven't figured that one out myself yet.

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    1. These are complex and interesting questions to ponder indeed, and there are many angles to it - the tendency to feel superior or "righteous" that can come out, or be felt that way by other people, when we talk about simplifying; this overall image of luxury or privilege that comes from it all (which is paradoxal really, as this is a very humble journey, initially), the questions of ethics and wanting to make a difference in the world, yet letting people making their own choices...
      To me, one of the questions I've been asking myself a lot lately is: do I really walk the talk? What does it mean to walk this talk? I feel like I have simplified my life a lot, that I'm making ethical choices and all, but when I look at the amount of my possessions and the money I spend each month, I still live like a western city dweller, my lifestyle doesn't really feel very ascetic. But then should I aim for an ascetic life? What part of it is hypocritical and what part of it really is approaching simplicity with moderation? What part of it is really efforts and what part of it is "cleaning my conscience"? Especially in Paris where a lot of products and shops are marketed toward people like me who can afford to make a difference with their wallet, what part of my habits is really conditioned by marketing? See, a lot of questions, most of them probably don't have a definite answer :)

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  8. Bonjour! I'm a long time reader but just speaking up for the first time. Just wanted to say how beautifully written this post is, and inspiring too. I also love buying flowers for myself at the supermarket. Yesterday, it was rose-orange tulips. All your blog ideas sound great! Look forward to seeing them soon in this space. (By the way, sorry if I sent you the same comment twice. I think Blogger just erased my first try?)

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    1. Thanks for commenting, it's very nice to hear from new commenters as well :) Flowers is this kind of small luxury that makes a real difference, isn't it? Ah, I've experienced this comment issue regularly with the Blogger comment system, when you log in as a blogger or google + account is deletes the comment from the field, unfortunately. It seems to be linked to Blogger so there isn't much I can do about it, thanks for taking the time to rewrite your comment :)

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  9. Thank you for the link love Kali! I was wondering where you went, I was about the check if my Bloglovin' was broken ;)
    It is so wonderful to hear that you get to be reunited with M. le fiancé! Congratulations, and all the best wishes for your apartment hunt. It is stressful but oh so much fun!

    I can't wait to read those future posts :)

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    1. Thanks Maja! Blogging inspiration comes and goes with the level of energy it seems (as you know I guess). Part of us is really excited to hunt for a new appartment, but it's probably going to be stressful in Paris. The good thing is, once we do find our place, we'll be even happier, and more grateful, to have found it :)

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  10. Your words just take me away. <3

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